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"Indulgence"

How long has it been since I've treated myself to something truly delicious? Is it all work and low-quality pleasures I've experienced recently? Don't I deserve to indulge in something that will make me genuinely happy and more full as a human being?

I deny myself the thought of frequently taking the time to find a good meal and enjoy it. It is not worth my time, I kid myself, in order to escape the rapacious claws of deep longings. I say I am happy without experiencing a hearty plate of a late-night meal, yet I lament sometimes when my mind roams free to think about it.

Am I better off eating disappointing meals so that I can leave and return to writing or reading or thinking? Are the nourishment of words and phonemes put together in a string of utter beauty in the wee hours of the night, separated from the corruption of daytime activity, sufficient enough for a hungry spirit? Should spiritual ever give way to material? Am I allowed the occasional instance of gluttony? Is epicureanism allowed or even good for you in moderation?

I have identified you as that person who may provide me a bountiful feast. Creator of the lightest and creamiest four cheese pasta, fajitas bursting with spicy flavor, and delectable slices of beef and bamboo in a steaming bowl of moist rice, not to mention maker of cinnamon apples, chocolate eclairs, and mince pie with homemade vanilla ice cream, you have what I desire, what I am allowing myself to take in.

Will you allow me to enjoy this? Will you let your gifts, talents, and knowledge of cooking atrophy instead of pleasing me with your crafts? Will you deny me that which I have worked so hard to deserve? I do not ask for much -- just a succulent meal. And perhaps if that works out, we can plan for future meals.

I drool at the possibilities of a full stomach washed down with a delicate drink, but I have to wonder, will the food be made with a personal touch, or will it be food prepared for just another dinner guest, soon to depart?

It is your responsibility to answer these questions. I will not commit one way or another until this is done.

Let me have my mince pie and eat it too.

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